work got busy for a change

last week FB was showing me "memories" from x yrs ago, im like wtf, its my wedding pic with doctor. turns out it was our 2yr wedding anniversary. we minimally celebrate, even if just eating a dinner together at home, the 28th of every month, which is the day we started dating. its far more important than the practical choice we made in august 2015. although the latter is a heavy legal contract, i find more joy in thinking about our whole journey together.

NYTimes opinion section: Is naming and Shaming Rapist the Only Way to Bring Them to Justice? NO. because thats not justice, even if it sounds like it. the world has gone fucking nuts. social media vigilantism shows the weaknessess of our species. the fact that rape cases are not dealth with properly or go to court often enough is a problem, as is the shame that is still attached to it which prevents women (or men) from even reporting)...  lots of problems, but i think at least in the west -which is what i am confortable talking about cos i dont know about the rest- we are goint to the  right directions. and stooping to middle ages style vigilantism is like going 50 steps back. it could bring the feeling of getting justice to some victims, but the type and size of the punishment is then anything and everything, depending on how convincing and heartfelt your story is, how good is your online presence and what kind of "online warriors" decide to act on the fury thats sparked. perhaps someone whose very passionate about it decided it's okay to beat up the named perpetrator. are we still cheering? lets say beating someone up is a fair punishment - especially if you are a village elder in the 15th century, okay, but rape is horrible, maybe the perpetrator should be tortured too, or killed? once the online viral machine gets going, you cant stop it and the opinion piece barely touches the problems of it. saying "But when a man is falsely accused, there are a number of avenues he can pursue to seek justice." yeah. so now we force another victim to struggle with the justice system, we just change genders. the writer continues "As well as rebutting the allegations in the forum where they are raised, he can complain to the police or sue for defamation.". hah...  imagine a man who has named a rapist going online and saying "i didnt do it, she is lying". the lynch mob would just get angrier...   okay im going to stop wasting time on this, but whatever the crime i hardly think this type of behavior is the solution, we need to fix the original problem and not create new problems and problematic behaviors. im as vengeful as any, but we've created a better justice system than the village council, because emotional people can act irrationally and cause more harm. call me an idealist, then.

ostrich steak and potatoes. pretty plain...    the steak was marinated, but still. it did the job. 

 art on the wall of a pub in Elephant & Castle.

we got a spice rack! proud of adding a plastic between the rack and wall so the spicers dont sratch the wall.

just over a week ago we went to Brighton and enjoyed the Pride parade there. Brighton is known for its LGBT culture so perfect time to visit...  it was very much worth it. plus a lovely little town in its own right, i could go again sometime :) the whole town was in festival mode and the parade was amazing. Brighton is just 1h by train and the return ticket was 11£ so not bad.

xmas came and passed

i was surprised to find myself listening to Spotify's jazzy christmas playlist on christmas eve. i dont really feel close to jazz, but it was easy enough to listen to, certainly not annoying.

me and doctor are planning a movie festival at home for new years eve. a 24h  program with probably 13 films. i know from experience thats a tall order, and its been "a few" years since i engaged in this type of stuff, im a bit concerned about staying awake that long anymore. its not really the time though, anyone can stay up for 24h, its when you sit and watch movies. but maybe i still have that super power in me, we will see. im predicting doctor to fall asleep during the 3rd one, latest.but he has deserved his sleep.

the program is still under work, but this is a rough sketch. im proud of the timer i built
(in google docs, the function is =TIME(A1,B1,C1) )

i think the challenge we had was picking light enough material towards the end. because i know you should watch the heavy, slow dramas first, after a while its not really doable... so then we googled some empty popcorn films to fill the program. really interesting stuff that didnt make it, and we will watch another time;
Third Person (romantic drama with interlocking stories)
Hot Girls Wanted (doc about young women pulled to sex trade)
Noah Chomsky: Rebel Without a Pause (self explanatory)
Carancho (crime drama from Argentina)

ive been readind film reviews and whatnot from AV Club lately. i dont know how new or old this site is, it just kind of popped out of nowhere, it seems. but immediately i noticed that the writers have a feminist & LGBT voice also covered, so its like good cultural journalism 2.0...or something. like this piece, which happens to be about feminist criticism.

Sziget report

back home from holidays! Vienna & Sziget were good, both eventful in different ways. although in our short stay in Vienna i found it really "slow", like, everything closed and even the magistrate was like a tomb minutes before our scheduled thing, we were wondering if we were in the wrong place or something. geez. i know august is a holiday month in Vienna but i got a little annoyed. Sziget was amazing like last time, just much more expensive. i guess they figured they can really cash in on (mostly) european travelers & party people (441 000 visitors this year!). but festival wise it was great. the scorching dry heat (36C) was a bit tough, add dusty air and it can get tiring.

i was a little busy in Vienna with my mind elsewhere so i didnt take too many snapshots which is a shame. kind of knew that going in, but u cant always have everything and thats the way it is. will post something later i guess...

but with Sziget fresh in my mind i have to write it out!

i love train stations arriving to a new country. the smells, architecture and people give you this sense of a new beginning. like a journey is about to start.  Budapest was no exception. although ive been there before, doesnt make a difference. only 2,5h from Vienna!

another thing that gives you an exciting sense of something about to start; the bridge to Sziget which welcomes 'szitizens' in many languages . 

laying down & degydrating in the heat. doctor looking through the program. 

the sunsets were beautiful. 

finnish-swedish comradery. 

main stage. 

 just people.

H&M's carousel. 

relaxing area was relaxing. 

 Sziget beach.

one of the main reasons i love Sziget is the many installations and artsy constructions for people to enjoy.

 Tedx tent.

light tunnel.

our camping area which was very cute in the night.

tent door was better left open to get some air in. on the last night when it rained heavily and we had to close it, we slept very poorly, suffering from lack of oxygen. some seams also leaked and we had troubles keeping our stuff dry (and couldnt, actually). but thats camping life! overall a nice experience. 

nachos and deep fried chicken. we also enjoyed wok, thai, italian bread, NY style hamburgers, hungarian flat bread, pasta and many other tasty things. i think this is *the* music festival for foodies, like a good balance of selection and quality.

one of the theatre shows we enjoyed. 

 the wine yard (selling wine by the jar/bottle)

enjoying late afternoon while listening to main stage.

argentinian Fuerza Bruta's show was cool. 

 i love festival nights, with the bright lights.

at the art area we tried sculpture making and did a musical instrument from an old keyboard. the projects and crafty opportunities are fun to do during the day while sailing between stages and relaxing. a lot of NGO's, organizations and even EU had their own tents.  museums also had representation and activities.

jazz & classical stage was the perfect place to relax and wind down in the noon/afternoon. its does not seem like the kind of music i typically listen to but it was fitting, kind of mainstream and suitable for all.

there was a love chapel, for szitizens to get married. providing a sziget marriage certificate and all. we felt like the certificate we got a couple days earlier was enough so did not re-marry in Sziget (to be honest mainly cos they required you to buy cheap rings as part of the fun, and since we already opted out on rings). 

the "LGBT tent" featured documentaries, discussions, drag shows and cabarets. very cool party atmosphere.

at the festival we spent some time with my finnish friends who were there, Ella & Sam, and then they ran into some more finnish people and we started all hanging out together in the evenings. they had this huge blue tarpaulin that we spread on the ground and sat on. eventually it got "somewhat" dirty though...

i was not impressed with the festival  line up to be honest, or perhaps it just wasnt my year. i was not interested in Avicii, Ellie Goulding nor Limp Bizkit, even if i recognize the hit songs. but im not a huge fan of live concerts anyway, it suits me quite well to just sit in the back and have the bands play what they play. I did want to see Interpol though and did enjoy the gig.  




back to civilization after the festival, in the city of Budapest. first things first; sushi (probably the only food not represented at the multicultural festival)

shopping. sorta...

Capulcu free market! it was just as hippie and merry as i expected. if not better. clothes, books, kitchen stuff. Carilyn and i hung around, the weather was warm - a bit too warm - but we had a good afternoon i believe.

LGBT org had their own table there too. with some Tom of Finland pics lying around.

this kitty enjoyed the market spirit too.

i took some clothes over to the market, ive been piling things i dont need or use anymore. or ever did. its kinda sad i had clothes with price tags still on...

i was surprised i came back with clothes as well. maybe i shouldnt be. erm. this "LOVE" t-shirt was cute with its kitschy roses. 

ive never been fond of tube style dresses like this. and i almost felt bad taking it with me as i thought it wouldnt look very good on me, but it does look ok. what a find! perhaps i should take it on the Thailand trip.

this looked like a long shirt first but i decided its definitely a dress. its a bit worn out but still looks fine - and i looove the pattern & colors. its a bit tent-like (the downsides of being short...) so i should use a belt i guess, cant glue my hand on my waist...

gah, some clothes just dont photograph well! at least when your stretching your arm trying to take a self portrait with your pocket camera...  but its a shame cos this dress is pretty amazing. black courderoy, by Sisley. again i was pretty pessimistic but took it with me cos it looked so gothic, in a nice office kinda way. but it fits like a glove, im just sad i need to wait until fall or winter to wear it. and i need to shorten the sleeves. more downsides to being short.

 dress looks better here. 

this somewhat cargo style skirt caught my attention right away. it fit me perfect, i think its one of my new favorites.

2 tops. a girl can never have too many tops. especially in warm climates.

in general, i have been feeling a bit lost lately :( like, identity crisis, or something :(