April 27, 2009

sink that teeth in and suck it up

okay it was not my day. towards the end its been getting easier but oh boy the day. i was really on the edge. i tried to draw this abstract stuff on paper, at work. i really picked up a real pencil and paper from the copy machine and i cannot remember the last time ive done such thing but now i did. and after some 2 hours of heavy cursing i had to give in. that was so hard. i was like a 3 yr old. miserable and agitated and (nearly) crying because id met my limits, i was not skilled to do what i wanted to. and sucking that in was just a bit much. i guess its been a while since i felt such failure. perhaps im wise to avoid it since it doesnt go down very well?

no but i have been a bit agitated the past week actually. hopefully itll pass, i cannot have little things (failing at my drawing mission is not a little thing, but there were other incidents, like the bloody map services online that dint work, i TRIED LIKE FREAKIN 3 OF THEM!!!) push me to the edge. it makes an intolerable co-worker as well...

god damn... the pound and euro seem to be even atm! ffffuuu*** i should be in london now.

this is a place called Nikkilä. not somewhere i enjoyed being necessarily, although the scenery was grat and eather nice...just not my cup of tea? however my aunt works there on monday evenings so she booked me for tonight and made molds of my teeth. for the piece of plastic that i need to keep my occlusion corrected... and also for planning the plastic veneers or whatever... the 'i want really nice teeth' -project is ON!

i had a good sunday though, did a lot of cleaning up and yet got to relax. saturday was okay as well. i spent the whole weekend at home. Arttu paid me a short visit on saturday but thats all. i had a weekend drinking session though, on thursday. practical? yes. and i didnt drink perhaps as much as i would on actual weekend, so thats kind of practical too.

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