August 06, 2009

picking up pieces

eaaarrly flight tomorrow :( and still so many things to do tonight. a couple essays on teaching methodology included...

im excited about the trip...as usual... i just want to get my mind elsewhere...always. and maybe this will help me put my pieces back together. i feel like a vase all over the fuckin floor... life has been beating me lately, or so it seems. with a baseball bat. there, right behind the knees. im in a rather painful state, the man i fell for is having some crisis of his own... and needs to think stuff through. and so he doesnt know yet what to 'do with me'. great, so ill just sit and wait here? fuck. but what a rare event, for me to find someone...doesnt happen too often. he is an architect, i liked the things he's designed.

so i dont know how to deal with this episode yet. because i dont know the state of it now...obviously. i wanted to see where it could go, i wanted to know if theres anything more in it. if i never find out, then...does that mean there was nothing more, and i shouldn't consider myself left in the dark? not finding out is an answer in itself perhaps?


and omg which shoes am i taking with me??! i always tackle with the same problems... and how to satisfy my True Blood need while on the road...i need to form a plan, so me and Miriam and can drool at them fangs...

F is getting married on saturday. things can change a lot in a little over a year... but i hope this is the right choice for him.

i met muuli yesterday... its been ages since we last saw and we talked about our shared photography project. it was rather inspiring...as usual.

jesus what a fuckin week. just saying.

*listening to U2: Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses"

2 comments:

NHNXC said...

Hey, I just wanna ask. What size of your t-shirt threadless anyway? hehe.
I hope you don't mine.
Thanks, have a great day!

suzi9mm said...

ummm what? what size -tshirts i wear?? M or L. i get L from Threadless, if that is what u asked. i dont mind, its just clothes hehe.