not my monday

our 2nd batch of cider (fruit wine at this point) is ready. technically. but now we are waiting...for something. not sure what, doctor is the wine maker of the family, Volkan gave him instructions. this one is apple&pineapple. im a little suspicious but i wanted to try it... live and learn. also i learned that in fact the wine/cider-making season is gonna be over soon! because of the heat, heat is not good for the process. so whatever cider we wanna drink until ...i dunno, november or so, we should do now.

hmm, where is my voting slip - i am expecting it to arrive in the mail. the municipal elections are like...soon. i want to vote! although im not around there.

i want to continue my tattoos this year. juuuust a bit.

i want to travel really bad but today as i was technically ready to book flights, i felt odd and nervous and anxious somehow. i was wondering if it means i am getting old. anyway, i decided to wait until i feel better. and now i think i do!

i think i would like to live in the US for some time. i would like to try settle in a western environment for change... something that is half-familiar, somewhere i can manage with the language. or London. earlier i thought i never could, the heating and everything there i thought was so old fashioned but lol, now i think i can deal with it. im still a fuckin princess, as doctor says -and as the tattoo at the back of my neck says, but .... im better than before. age...hmmm mm. i am still not as flexible as Miriam. she is now in Nepal and has to go to a cafe for internet. electricity is random and ...i dunno, its pretty simple.which is beautiful - i just dont wanna do that. but she can, which is great. i wish i had been able to visit but she is leaving Nepal soon. and going to Kongo in the fall i think. i wanna go there instead then.

hmm, polar bear Knut from the Berlin (?) zoo died. thats sad. he was a cute white thing.

from polar bears i smoothly go to bunnies. i also got myself the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson. i thought doctor might enjoy it too and i can totally watch it again.

Mark McGrath seems pretty sharp in The Apprentice.

today was bad for me though. i just felt blaaaah. i know buying something helps. i dont know if theres anything worse. i guess there could be. getting off on the pain of other people or animals or something... actually, getting off on buying shit is not so bad. a bit bad - but could be worse. anyway so i bought tights. simple and pretty cheap.