April 13, 2011

frozen in place

coming home and looking in the mirror i realize i have a big bruise on my cheekbone. i knew there was a small one since the botox shot on saturday broke a vein, but it seems to have just grown and grown. i bet someones already looked at me and thought my husband is beating me up. the botox itself is slowly starting to effect, too. eyebrows are raising higher and i cant look too angry anymore, and my forehead has been feeling frozen. in fact this has caused me a lot of confusion. normally when talking to someone i would raise my eyebrows, i guess its a sign of interest and ...whatever. now, my body is telling my my eybrows are (probably) down, since i am not knowingly raising them, and i have felt uncomfortable in my face-to-face communications. yet, when i look in the mirror, i can see the eyebrows are pretty much where they should be. stuck up. cool. but my body is not aware of it and i am confused with my mixed messages. i am not sure how to "follow up" my upper face with my mouth and i find myself quite serious and my jaw hurting in the afternoon. i cant be the first one with these problems? i am out of sync, i guess it takes a while to figure out what i look like again... i should google this.

i havent really thought about the fact that im going to Dubai on thursday. i guess i should go to Burj Khalifa. weird to think its over 30C there. its been so bloody cold here, altho the spring arrived once or twice it went back... horrible april :(

on another note, i was not so cheery today. quite the opposite.

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