November 18, 2007

time flew by this weekend. i still have cough altho the kitties left like a week or 2 weeks ago. i think i need to see a doctor about it, it almost feels like it could be an infection of some kind, but in that case, is it related to the allergy or not? ill find out.

i didnt manage to stay dry this weekend either... oh well. maybe ill just settle for drinking less than before. on friday, well we went eating with F's parents and their friends. had a shot for starters and wine later and it kind of got me kickstarted. the restaurant was nice, F picked it, Kynsilaukka where they make everything with garlic, even drinks. i wouldnt mind going there again sometime. yesterday we drove to F's twin brothers family, which is 2 hours away from here. we stayed the night and left this afternoon. in the evening, after kids went to sleep, well we had a few drinks. but im not having any today which makes it only 2 drunk-days this week. sounds like a lot but right now im happy with the results. because of the time we spent, i got to know the kids a little better and to my relieve i somewhat got along with them or ...something. more than that, really, i think that when i relaxed and could be myself it was easy. i still remember some things from being a kid and my genuine self has a lot of childish features left. the older girl (aged 4) is having a crush on F sorta and its cute when shes all over him. he likes her so much. she woke us up in the morning, and as we were sleeping in the parents bedroom, it felt like we were parents. she brought her toys and started playing on the bed as we laid there still half sleep. i dont want to be a parent at all, but it is funny how nice in a way that single moment was. outside little moments here and there, theres no fuckin way id want the whole package.

i think i got along with the brother+wife as well. id always had a good feeling about them, and last night especially we had fun, feels like they more less accept me so i am quite happy.

my skin is dry as hell. ive slept with my make up on and havent been able to moisturize it and ...well now i have a lot of work to do to fix this.

someone i dont know asked to be my 'friend' in Facebook, and his message was
"hey beauty! id love to be your friend. *hugs* [name]"
(in finnish "hei kaunotar! olisi mukava saada sinut kaverikseni. *halaus* [nimi]")
well seems pretty obvious at first, he does look like a serious photographer though, so im a bit puzzled. should i know him! then again he doesnt talk as if we did. i am pretty allergic to lines like the one he uses to salute me.... also ive said i wont accept any friend requests from people i dont actually know so that would rule him out. but now i wonder if Facebook is changing, maybe i should too. but his words are a turn off im afraid. it reminds me as i was just telling F today how he shouldnt say "youve become so pretty!" or similar his brothers girls when he sees them. he didnt, but we were discussing the most common things relatives say when they see kids once a year or whatever. "you have grown so much!" is pretty damn common. i have to admit very harmless though. but i said you shouldnt use "pretty" or "beautiful" constantly anyway as it emphasizes the messages that girls already get about having to be beautiful, as if they have to be pretty to be 'something', worthy of a compliment. you need to find something else positive or encouraging to say when you see little girls. its a small thing but its something you can do thats thoughtful. oh, F's brothers older daughter had these Bratz dolls and one of them was just like me. all of us recognized the similarity as it was quite distinctive. the doll had long black hair as i used to, almost the same length even, and a lot of make up to say the least... similar lip make up and high heels. even the eyebrows were much like mine. it was a doll and they look a certain way but it just seemed much like me. lol, i just realized the doll is plastic too of course. nevermind im giggling alone.

facts about the barcode (666...) no need to read the end.

i feel slightly ill. besides the throat, i have a bit dazed, odd feeling. i read in the news about this russian doomsday cult, that shut themselves underground somewhere 600km from moscow. theres 29 of them and the police is trying to talk them out of there.... i dont see the point, am i an ass? if they want to wait for the doomsday, let them. maybe they'll die there, maybe not. it sucks for the kids though :(

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